Dear Doc Lovelace,
My husband and I have been married for two years but we’ve been together for three years, and my issue is that he doesn’t stand up for himself. He’s a very sweet person, and he has a good job, but when it comes to certain people, especially his family, he seems to always give in to them and he doesn’t stand up for himself.
For example, his father and he will be talking about something, let’s say something political, and during the conversation, he’ll just nod and quietly agree with his dad even though I know that he believes the complete opposite of him. Or, there have numerous situations in the past where he feels like his mom will guilt-trip him into going somewhere or doing something with her or for her that he doesn’t want to do. I’m not saying that he shouldn’t help out his mom, but when things come up that she or his dad can do for her, why should he be the one who’s forced into doing things he doesn’t want to do? His mom knows what she’s doing, even if he doesn’t see it like that.
How can I tell him that he should focus more on US and let his family fend for themselves more?
Hi Mrs. Lucky Lady,
I’ve met so many like you. Keep it up and you’ll make that sweet as pie husband of yours miserable.
It’s funny that you would use discussing politics as an example.
Ask yourself this:
“Why in the hell would you want your sweetness to spend the little time you allow him with his parents to argue about politics?”
Here’s my advice: Jump in and help him do the thing or go to the place with his mom.
By the way, who taught your sugar lips to be so sweet?
A good guess would be his mom and dad. Invite them over for dinner. Show some respect,
Your husband will appreciate it, and so will they. Stop being so needy, it’s unattractive. Let him do his thing with his parents and you concentrate on being his hot, sweet wife… (think negligee, not nagging).
You are the lucky one, you got the guy that respects and honors people he loves. Be nice, share him.
I’m wondering how you treat your parents, and why they didn’t teach you some manners.
Your Baby Cakes is thanking his parents every time he does something for them, every time he chooses to let it go, and not argue.
It’s called love, respect, kindness, being polite.
If you want a man that dumps his family because he got married, you’re wanting a man that would dump you when he meets a nicer newer model.
Do yourself a favor, don’t ruin a good thing.
Respectfully,
Doc Lovelace
